


Break

by Viridian5



Category: Andromeda
Genre: Drama, Eureka Maru, Gen, Pre-Andromeda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-05-29
Updated: 2003-05-29
Packaged: 2017-10-02 08:16:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Viridian5/pseuds/Viridian5
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harper learns another condition of his stay the hard way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Break

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Substance/Abuse](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4374) by [Viridian5](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Viridian5/pseuds/Viridian5). 



> Spoilers for "The Pearls That Were His Eyes" and "Be All My Sins Remembered."
> 
> A pre-Andromeda story. This is a Harper’s POV companion to "Substance/Abuse," written because Karra asked for it.

Harper had a pretty girl in his bunk--okay, not _his_ bunk, the empty bunk--yet all he wanted to do was pet and snuggle and giggle. No sex drive at all. He shouldn’t approve of something that did this to him, but it felt too good being this warm and silly. He was so, so stoned. They’d been running hard and fast on jobs lately, struggling to keep above the red, and he deserved a break.

For a while he heard a thumping of approaching boots, then the thumping stopped. He smiled when he looked up to see Beka, beautiful from the top of her redhead to the bottoms of her steel-toed boots. His captain, his freedom. Damn, he loved her. Taking a chance on psycho Bobby maybe dumping him in a shallow grave back when had been worth it.

"Hey, uhm," What did he call her? "boss." He laughed. "Hi." She needed to try this stuff too. Maybe it would smooth out those worry lines.

Her face twisted, then she walked past him without a word. Disgust. She’d been disgusted by him. The door to the cockpit closed shut behind her, and he heard the lock engage.

Oh, fuck. The warmth and silliness blew right out him, replaced by a clammy nausea. What had he done? What had he done wrong?

"You didn’t tell me you had a girlfriend, Harper," Ethlynn said as she stroked his arm.

"She’s my captain." Please let her still be his captain. She wouldn’t chuck him out without getting his side of the story first, would she?

Would she?

He’d _disgusted_ her. What had he done wrong? Was she pissed that Ethlynn was there? Had he forgotten something? Had he been too informal or fucked up in front of her? What?

Don’t panic. It could blow over. Or it might be fixable, so he had damage control to do.

"You have to go," he said to Ethlynn.

"What?" She laughed. "You sure she’s not your girlfriend?"

She purred when he grabbed her arm but pouted when he pulled her up by it and dragged her to her feet. "You have to go." He shoved her all the way to the exterior door.

"I’m never doing anything with you again," she said, sounding petulant, just before he closed the door in her face. Too bad, but while Ethlynn was pretty, Beka was his captain and his home in space.

His heart pounded when he saw that Beka still hadn’t opened or unlocked the cockpit door. "Beka? Boss?" Nothing. Oh, was she pissed. Putting his hand against the door, he yelled, "Beka. Beka! C’mon, open the door! We can talk about this, right? What did I do? Beka? Please?"

No answer. Maybe she couldn’t hear him?

Maybe she didn’t want to hear him. "Beka!"

He pounded on the door, yelling. He kept pounding on the door, his terror growing. She was pissed, and he knew the conditions of his stay here. She’d throw him back to Earth, and it would be a thousand times worse now that he knew what life _could_ be like. Then again, the Ubers would probably kill him as an example to the other kludges as soon as they found him. Or Beka would hand him right over to spacer Dragans to avoid the travel time and fuel waste.

She could do anything. He’d seen her hold a mad for ages. What would he do if she didn’t want him anymore?

Techno wizard that he was, he could pop this lock in a minute, but if _she_ didn’t want the door opened, it would be one more show of unreliability and one more transgression. He would lose.

Eventually his knuckles and strength gave out, and he couldn’t breathe well enough to yell through the crying. He slid to his knees and scratched and scratched at the door.

Eventually, to his relief, she opened it. Her anger and disgust didn’t seemed to have dimmed at all if he could judge by the expression on her face. He couldn’t stand it.

He had to prove his case here and now. "Boss? I’m sorry, boss, I’ll be good, I’ll fix it...." He wanted to grab her around the waist and plead, but the grabbing might piss her off.

"I don’t trust this. Are you coming down?" She sounded cold.

"No! This is me! I’m sorry. Whatever I did wrong, I’ll undo or never do again. Really. You don’t have to throw me away." She had to approve of him.

"I hate drugs."

Hate drugs? "I know. I know, but I thought that was just for you and it’s not like I have a problem or a habit. It was just once, and only because Ethlyn wanted me to give it a go. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry."

She’d never had a problem with him drinking. Earth folk drank; it was the only other amusement the downtrodden had aside from fucking. Did she have a problem with his drinking too but hadn’t said anything and let it fester until she caught him high and blew up? He didn’t know. He just didn’t know. He’d have to wait and see, if she let him wait and see. If she wanted it, he’d be sober for the rest of his life.

"I told you what would happen if I wasn’t pleased with your performance."

"Yeah. Yes, you did," he gasped.

"I’m not pleased."

Shaking, Harper let out a small, squeezed sound of pain and swallowed hard. "Please, boss. Please don’t." She would either kick him out or make him pay. He’d rather pay.

"What will you do to make it up to me?"

"Anything! Whatever you say. Anything."

He tried not to get too hopeful as she sat beside him on the floor. Then she said, "You have to make it up to me. I’ll let you stay, but if you fuck up like this again, I will dropkick you out an airlock." Hard and serious.

But yes! Reprieve! He would be so good....

Harper put his arms around her neck and clung close, shivering. "Yeah. Yeah, boss. Thank you. Thank you." He set his face against her shoulder so he could remind himself that she was warm and solid and still his.

She put an arm around him and petted his hair, which made him sigh and slowed his racing heart. Forgiveness. "You remember this," she said.

She didn’t have to worry about that.

 

### End


End file.
